By Eliza Pieschel
Rom-coms are one of the most popular book and movie genres. The mix of love and comedy allows for a lot of fun stories that grab people by the heart. Of course, many of these stories feature “tropes,” or recurring motifs. For example, in rom coms, common relationship tropes are enemies to lovers, friends to lovers, love triangles, academic rivals, forced proximity, etc.
If you are a romance reader you have most likely heard of the Enemies to lovers trope or rivals to lovers. In the trope, one character usually has something against the other, or they compete with one another. The rollercoaster that comes with it is exciting and thrilling and keeps readers/watchers on their toes. They are usually forced to spend time together whether because of work, sports, school, or any other reason, and are forced to get used to each other.
Enemies to lovers was voted as people’s favorite trope to watch/read on our Valentine’s Day survey. There are endless stories with this trope and the variety of other possible details that can be added on makes every story different. A classic movie that follows this trope is 10 Things I Hate About You, which is a favorite movie of mine. A very recent addition to the trope is now in theatres, and you’ve probably heard about it. Anyone But You, starring Glen Powell and Sydney Sweeney, is the newest enemies to lovers movie. It also seems to have revived rom-coms. While the reviews are mixed, overall audiences have been entertained and enjoyed the movie.
The second most popular trope to watch or read was friends to lovers. As common as this is in real life, it makes sense for many people to want to read and watch shows about it. The slow burn that it usually comes with this kind of story can be very satisfying and sweet. (Slight New Girl spoilers ahead.) In the TV show, New Girl, the main character Jess ends up moving in with three roommates who are all guys and all friends before she comes. At first, it’s awkward but Jess’s friendly demeanor leads to her forming real bonds with her roommates. After becoming friends, Jess and Nick become more than friends because they truly like each other and work well. There are many examples of shows where they sneak in little friends-to-lovers relationships like that to add to the plot.
A rom-com staple, 13 Going on 30 follows this trope. A girl transforms into an adult overnight after wishing that she could because she thought life would be better. (BTW, age and body swap plotlines are a trope all of their own!) She realizes she lost her best friend because they grew apart and once they realize what they lost, they wish they could turn back time to when he wasn’t getting married to someone who wasn’t her.
Some people read and watch shows that match the trope they would most want to experience in real life. This explains why watching and reading friends-to-lovers stories is so popular. The majority of Lovett students voted that they would most want to experience friends/best friends to lovers in real life which is a common experience given that being someone’s friend shows you a lot more of a person including the good and bad. There is a built-in foundation from being friends that comes with trust and familiarity.
Sometimes it’s stressful trying to appeal to strangers, but a close friend already knows the best and worst of you. In a relationship, you need someone you can talk to, and joke with, someone who will always be there for you and support you, and you need to have a strong foundation based on the same values that are necessary in friendships.
The second most popular trope students wanted to experience in real life was enemies to lovers. There is a spark and excitement that comes from this trope that doesn’t come from the others because of its twists and turns and seeing how the relationship grows. For the same reason people like to entertain themselves through reading and watching this trope, it brings excitement to life and its unexpectedness and slow-burn timeline make it so.
Friends to lovers was not only first in wanting to be experienced but also in actually being experienced. When asking Lovett students what tropes they have experienced in real life, the most common one by far was friends to lovers. For the same reasons why so many people want to experience it. It is an easy transition, because of the familiarity that you already have with the person and the connection you have as friends that can simply evolve.
The second most common experience people had in real life was a love triangle, which is seen in lots of books and shows such as the popular book and show series, The Summer I Turned Pretty by Jenny Han and a similar show series, My Life With the Walter Boys. This usually looks like two people liking the same person, and that person being put in an awkward situation between two possible people.
Love triangles can be chaotic for both the people crushing, and the person being crushed on. When being crushed on, it’s difficult to choose between two people, especially knowing one of them will get their feelings hurt, or maybe you don’t like either, or can’t choose. When crushing, it’s stressful knowing that you have competition, and can cause drama and tension between friendships. So if you are experiencing a love triangle, good luck.
It really can be difficult to avoid romanticizing romantic tropes. But we do have some more practical-minded people here at Lovett. When we asked on our survey, “Would you rather be the funny best friend of the protagonist avoiding love, or the main protagonist who goes through a rollercoaster ride of relationships and emotions but ends up with ‘the one?’” 55% wanted to avoid the rollercoaster ride through relationships and be the funny best friend who supports the protagonist. The other 45% were willing to go through a lot knowing by the end they would get their happily ever after.
We also asked, “Would you rather have a crush on someone who doesn’t feel the same way but it inspires creativity and success, or be in a successful relationship but lack the flame of inspiration?” The responses were not quite as evenly split, with 40% of people willing to risk the inspiration that can lead to success and excitement from inside creativity for a successful relationship. The other 60% would rather have a crush on someone who doesn’t feel the same, but it leads to a boost in self-expression.
Ann Reed Taylor told me she watches a lot of rom-coms. “I don’t know if it’s my favorite genre, but they’re fun to watch, especially with friends,” she said. She enjoys watching both shows and movies but likes movies more.
She said that How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days was her favorite rom-com, which leans toward an enemies-to-lovers plotline. For her job, the main character makes an article on how to lose a guy in ten guys so she finds this guy to choose to “lose,” however he also has a secret bet (a trope all by itself) with his friends that he can make any girl fall in love with him in ten days. When I asked why the movie was her favorite, Ann Reed said, “The actors are really good, the plot is more unique than other rom-coms and it’s just a classic.”
Overall, she said her favorite rom-com trope is enemies to lovers or childhood friends to lovers because they are slow-burn. I asked if she thought that there is such a thing as a movie being “too tropey.”
“I think if there is no originality to the movie, like no new plot twist or cute moments between the characters then it is too cliche and cringe,” she said. “Yet, there still have to be some classic moments in it to be good and fun to watch.”
