by Campbell Key
In a recent article in the New York Times titled “A Generationally Perpetrated Pattern: Daughters Do More Chores,” the author examined a survey on children and chores. The central focus was on the difference between boys and girls in this area of home life. It turns out that boys get paid more for chores, and have less work than girls do. For example, boys would get paid to shower, and brush their teeth, but girls would not. Now what does that say about their hygiene? But still, boys just overall would do less work, and got paid almost double of what girls got paid.
All of this was quite thought-provoking, and it led me to wonder what kinds of chores Lovett students are expected to do, whether they are compensated, how the chores are enforced, and whether gender played a role.
I went into my interviews thinking that students, regardless of gender, are given the same amount of chores and allowance. This was at least true at my house, and at my friends’ houses. But I wasn’t sure about everyone else, so I decided to do my own investigating.
First of all, there was little consistency when it came to compensation for chores. Very few people I talked to had a regular allowance. Freshman Heyward Bost sometimes helps fold laundry, and if she does she’ll get paid “just because my mom doesn’t like too.” Another ninth grader, Margaret Hare, said she is supposed to get an allowance “but most of the time I don’t get it.”
Another question I asked was whether the work allocation was generally fair in a home with multiple children. All the students thought it was equal, including the boys I interviewed. One out of the eleven people I interviewed said that she had to do more work than her two older sisters, but this isn’t a gender difference, this is just an age difference.
Surprisingly, there were not too many complaints about having to do chores. On average, students were given about 9-28 chores per week. This sounds like a lot, 28 chores every week! But, thinking about it, it is only 4 chores per day which isn’t bad when two of them might be making the bed, and loading the dishwasher, which take about five minutes.
The only person who complained about having to do chores said that she never had enough time to finish her chores, and if she doesn’t do them, her phone is taken away. The ten other students interviewed were not bothered by them.
Avoiding punishment is certainly an understandable reason not to skip your chores, but a lot of students don’t have a punishment. No one blew them off, so really, there wasn’t a need for punishment.
Not all of the chores happen on a regular basis. Students are often asked to do favors around the house. Most students said that once or twice a week they are randomly expected to do chores such as help with dinner, or take the dog out. None of the students expected money for doing these extra chores.
I read once that giving money to kids for doing their chores makes them expect money for doing anything helpful, such as if a parent needs help taking groceries inside. If their kid helps them, he or she will expect money for just doing them a favor. Another article I read from the Times (an op-ed piece titled “Happy Children Do Chores”) stated that chores help kids “develop an awareness of needs of others,” so if kids always expect money for just helping their parents, are chores really helping them?
Personally, I believe that chores should be assigned to kids and kids should be expected to complete them, without punishment, but also without reward. When chores are just a habit, young adults are more prepared to move out of the house and become adult adults. So, when they do the dishes, or mow the lawn, or take out the trash, they won’t be surprised when five dollars doesn’t appear out of thin air.
And speaking of adults, I checked in with a few Lovett teachers, who all said that they are glad that they had chores as a kid.
Math teacher Ms. Sample said doing chores helped her appreciate her parents more and how hard they worked. She figured if they worked so hard all week, she should at least get help around the house. Ms. Sample did say that she got an allowance that was linked to her chores.
Also, it helped her become more fastidious as an adult. “I wasn’t glad at the time,” she said, “but it helped me become a cleaner person in general, and want things tidy.”
So if you’re not thrilled right now about having to put away those dishes, vacuum the floor, or make a path to your bed through your clothes, you might appreciate it later.
